I have thought a few times recently that I need to write about weaning the twins. I wrote here about breastfeeding twins and what it looked like from my perspective.
I read this article that Meg wrote about weaning her baby and I wanted to respond in the comments, but my response would be too long for a simple comment.
The twins are going to be 4 in May. We have whittled our way down to a morning and evening nurse (on a good day). We only nurse on my bed. There are days where they will ask for more. There are nights when they will ask for more. It’s a work in progress.
During the day, we go through a list now:
- do you need mommy (or daddy) to play with you?
- are you thirsty?
- are you hungry?
- are you tired?
- do you need a cuddle?
Most of the time we find something on the list that works.
During the night, it is harder. It’s harder to say no at night. They cry and I want them to go right back to sleep and not wake up the rest of the house. I am trying to wait a few minutes before giving in and it is working (sometimes).
I want to completely drop all night waking and nursing first and then move on to the last two feeds. We are so close.
- We have talked about nursing only in mummies room. (unless you are bleeding from your nose and then you can nurse anywhere you want).
- We have talked about them being big kids now and how the nummies won’t be there forever.
- We have talked about them needing to finish nursing so we can move on to potty training (all 3 of my big boys toilet trained very quickly at the age of 4). The twins love peeing in the tiny potty at bath time, so it won’t be long now.
I will be honest, I had no intention of nursing beyond three. Hosanna had so many allergies and needed the comfort when she woke with itchy eczema feet and ankles that it just worked for us. It was easier to nurse and go back to sleep. Well, with twins… what one wants, the other expects.
I am just spent, done, ready to quit, but I have learned from past nursing experiences (3 older boys) that FOR ME dropping the feeds slowly and making the experience end well is what I really want. I don’t want to quit in frustration (which I totally have been tempted to do MANY times over the last little while).
I want the end that I had with Malachi. It was a gentle wean and one day I realized it was over and it was okay. Malachi and I nursed through many changes and transitions in our family and it worked really well for us. He nursed until around his third birthday. I remember sitting on his bed one day trying to remember the last time we had nursed and then I realized it was over, but it was okay.
I also think about if the twins will be our last babies (yes, I know they are not babies any more, humor me). I am nearing 40. Elisha keeps reminding me that I will be 40 in the year he turns 13. Oh, isn’t that lovely! It makes me feel a little old to realize that next year I will have a teenager. Where did the time go? So, I have been thinking about the twins possibly being our last babies and while I am tired and only just now getting my brain back, I am a wee bit sad.
Babies are so much fun. They bring life and energy to any home, but they are also a ton of work and wrought with sleepless nights. I would love to have more babes, but that is not up to me, it’s up to God.
Back to the article that Meg wrote on her blog. I loved it. I also wanted to offer hope. She mentioned that she was recently diagnosed with PCOS. I was diagnosed with PCOS a very long time ago (I was in my late teens) and we have had 5 beautiful babies. We have also had 3 very emotional miscarriages. I don’t know if the miscarriages are related to the PCOS or not, but it is not the doctor or the diagnoses that decides if you have more babes or not. Just keep that in mind.
I would love to hear your breastfeeding/weaning stories if you want to share them in the comments or leave a link to blog posts you have written.