Having Higher Expectations

Posted on October 19, 2011 by Honey

I realized something this week, I am guilty of always thinking that my kids can't do things. I am pretty sure this line of thought stems from Elisha's ADHD and autism and wanting to avoid stress added stress in our home.

When you have a child with ADHD or autism, you already have a complex child and you want to make life as simple and calm as possible. At least that is what we wanted to do. Even the simplest things would cause meltdowns in the past. All of these things below have caused some form of sensory issue for Elisha in the past.

putting on socks
putting on shoes
clothing needs to be simple and comfortable (no zippers or buttons)
change in routine
brushing teeth
bathing

Let me tell you, we have seen marked improvement in the past year and see little to no issues for most of these areas most of the time.

In the past, anytime that Elisha would try something new he would have a meltdown. We have seen this over and over again over the years. Instead of challenging him and pushing him to try new things, we avoided them. This was the best solution for us at the time, but I am rethinking that solution (for the season we are in now) because Elisha is coping with everyday things much more easily and I want to stretch him a little bit.

I have realized that we need to let the other kids surpass Elisha in whatever areas they need to. This has been a hard lesson for me grasp. I have always held it in my head that he is the oldest, so the other kids can't move on until he does, but this kind of thinking is only holding all the other kids back.

I have also realized that because Elisha has been allowed to get away with saying, "I can't," the other kids are starting to use that excuse too, before they even try. I want to curb that excuse now before it becomes paralyzing for them. They need to grow up believing they can do anything they set their minds to, but for some things they may just have to work harder than others.

These thoughts were on my mind because I instituted daily journal writing and two children complied, while one complained (and not the one you would think). While talking to our support teacher recently, I was inspired to have the kids work REALLY HARD on their printing this year. The idea that we came up with was a SIMPLE daily journal that would increase in difficulty through out the year.

For the first little while we are going to go back to basics and work on printing the date, our name, and ONE word. Now, before you think this is crazy for kids who are in 3rd, 5th, and 6th grades, let me tell you something. We do most of our work orally or with projects that require very little printing. Printing has always caused a great deal of stress (and we avoid stress, remember).

For Elisha the stress was due to fatigue. He has low muscle tone and his hand and arm get tired very quickly when he is printing. This is compounded by the need to hold the pencil tightly and push very hard so he has some sensory feedback.

For the other kids, I just didn't push hard. They would cry and say they couldn't and I would back off (because I had been conditioned to prevent the meltdowns). I am not saying that I was right or wrong to not push them, but we are now at the place where they need to be pushed, so that we can move forward. They need to master printing this year, it is as simple as that. We are going to take it one step at a time and see how far we can grow in our skills this year.

If this is something that your child/children struggle with, you might find it useful to print out this week's journal page and follow along with us on our journey.

journal 1

Have You Heard Of Glue Dots?

Posted on October 15, 2010 by Honey

I first heard of Glue Dots through my friends on Twitter. I was intrigued and determined to check them out. I homeschool a child with Autism and ADHD who has fine motor and sensory issues among other things. I have always wanted a simple way for him to participate in creating projects with us without stress and frustration.

Elisha hates regular white glue. He doesn't like getting it on his fingers and completely freaks out and melts down when it does. He has sensory issues and just does not like the feel of the glue on his fingers or how it dried on him.

Elisha doesn't like the glue sticks either because he has to push too hard and he could never get the coverage just right. He has fine motor challenges and this is sometimes too much work for him.

I questioned Glue Dots on Twitter regarding how they might work with a child with sensory issues and they gave me an email address to contact them. I sent them an email. They responded offering to send me some samples. Well, of course I jumped at the chance to try out this product and offered to write a review of our experiences with the Glue Dots that they sent us.

We received the package in the mail and did a simple craft project to test out the Glue Dots. I chose a torn paper art project because then all the kids (all 5 of them) even the twins (2) could participate. All the kids found the Glue Dots easy to use. There was no crying because of glue on fingers.

I didn't have my new camera when we did this project, so I don't have any decent pictures, but rest assured I will be writing more about this product because we LOVE IT.

I would highly recommend it for any child, especially those with sensory or fine motor issues. They have a huge variety of different products as you can see when you explore their website - Glue Dots.

Here are the products that they sent me:

Disclosure: I was sent the above mentioned products in exchange for an honest review on my site.

Teaching to Meet His Senses

Posted on September 10, 2010 by Dawn

"He's like a fart in a frying pan"

"A what?!"

"A fart in a frying pan... You know, he goes pop! over here, and pop! over there and he's all over the place, popping up and down. Sit, stand, sit, stand."

"OHHHH! Okay I get it!"

This may seem like a rather unorthodox conversation to you, but it is an actual conversation I had with the regular ed kindergarten teacher whose class my then 5 year old special needs son attended for half of his kindergarten day. I really did get it. And I wasn't offended.

My son is now 10, and has been home for school for the past 3 years, but his early special ed experiences did give me some insight into what worked-- and doesn't work-- with public education. Sensory seeking kids do not fit into a public educational system without A LOT of accommodations. Generally, schools don't even try to accommodate. This was our experience anyway.

Coming home to homeschool was freedom for him, but created a new, weird learning curve for me. The boy who simply CAN NOT stay seated, but doesn't have ADD, can frustrate me, make me just a little bit crazy, and has forced me to become infinitely creative. Here are some ideas which just might work, and just might help, for your child who seeks sensory input throughout the day.

Heavy Work: Have him lift something heavy. The coffee table if he's 5. Sacks of potting soil if he's older. Junior high age? Let him jack the car up and release. Do push-ups, with something on his back if he's older. A small sibling can sit on his back if he's in high school. Give him something heavy to push, pull, lift, or drag and his sensory system will ping in delight. He will probably be much calmer afterward, too.

To Stay Seated: If you must keep your child seated for some writing or other thing that requires it, try using a throw pillow on her lap. My son knows now that he can go get one and put it on his lap while he's seated. It isn't magical, and isn't heavy. It's just a reminder that I need his rear touching his chair. When he goes to stand up he encounters this minor barrier and thinks (sometimes out loud) "I need to stay in my chair!" It works.

Use Movement To Memorize Things or Practice Facts: You can purchase a mini-trampoline at W/Mart for under $20. Around our house, we practice math facts, skip counting, Spanish vocabulary, and work on our Scripture Memory System while the boys take turns jumping on the mini-tramp. It works! It engages their bodies and their minds at the same time. It is particularly a good thing when the sensory system settles into slug mode, and the eyes begin to droop. It wakes up his senses and his brain, and he's ready to GO afterward.

If you have a child who seeks sensory input, get creative. Offer him or her ways to get the input that will enable them to continue participating in your school day. Both of you will be a LOT happier!

Note: If you are the homeschooling parent of a special needs child, I would love to have you tell your story here. Please use the contact form to drop me a note.